Here it comes

Am I freaking out about turning 50? Let me count the ways.

As I was getting ready for work this morning I took a step back and looked all the bottles of vitamins and herbal supplements I take each day to keep from dying. I counted. Eleven. I take eleven herbs and spices every morning, and just like KFC I am neither organic nor free range.

I have not been sleeping lately. Bad dreams, mostly about dying. This obsession with death has even prompted me to get my will done. That was fun.

Speaking of not sleeping and death, something odd happened this week.  First you need to know that when I was small child one time I woke up in the middle of the night. I knew something weird was going on. I looked out of my bedroom window to see a small white cat standing in our driveway. I could tell this was significant, that this meant something, like the cat could read my mind. Was he my sprit animal, there to lead me through my life? I looked down for a moment when I looked back up he was gone. It freaked me out and I never forgot about it. Weird little white cat.

Then a couple days ago I came home from work to see a white cat with sitting in my back yard. He was old, fat, and only had one ear. He was friendly so I have him a small bowl of Evo high protein cat food and some San Pellegrino to drink. As he gobbled away at the food it occurred to me that this was probably my spirit animal coming back to guide me into the afterlife. Old, fat, missing an ear, only willing to drink fizzy mineral water imported from Italy, he’s got to be for me. I decided to name him Carl. He’s still hanging around here, waiting, and drinking San P.

I did have a very nice little birthday send off from my family last weekend. We met up on Snoqualmie Summit to have breakfast. Just me, my Mom and Dad, and my sisters. No husbands. They gave me a bunch of money to use in Italy. It was really lovely.

Ah Italy. Tainted again by it's appalling legal system. I am worried that I will get arrested for dressing badly or being fat so I bought this travel insurance called International SOS. Apparently I can just ring them up and they will swoop in with a private jet and fly me home. 

I leave in exactly one week. It’s just starting to sink in – both going to Italy and turning 50. What did I accomplish in my 40’s other than getting fat? Well there are those 20 trips to Hawaii. And this will be my 8th trip to Europe. I guess that is something.

For my 30th birthday I sat on the banks of the Mississippi River in New Orleans and a cockroach crawled over my foot at the stroke of midnight. The next day I spent in one of those above ground graveyards in New Orleans.

For my 40th birthday I was on Maui, at Keawakapu beach, and at midnight I cried. I had cut my toe on a rock and blood squirted into the water where sharks waited to eat me.  I was crying about turning 40, not about my hurt toe.

For my 50th I will be in Rome. I’m spending the day touring the Vatican. What is worse: cockroaches, sharks, or cardinals in red dresses?  I think you know my answer. 

If I don't blog about Rome, Naples, or Positano you will know. Carl took me away.  

Hoping to blog again soon,

~Orange Clove Head




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