New car

The last time I bought a new car was in the year 2001. I woke up that morning and said, “I am going to go buy a new car. It will be red and have intermittent windshield wipers.” It did.

The car before that was my first new car - as opposed to a used car. I drove to Kirkland and bought a pickup. It was white and did not have intermittent windshield wipers. It was a manual transmission. I did not know how to drive a manual transmission so I had to stay in Kirkland for 3 days until I figured out how to get it home. There were a couple of tear-filled temper tantrums on the bridge coming back as I stalled it out in traffic. Many tear-filled temper tantrums followed in the years that I had that stupid pickup. 

Eliminating manual transmission cars is one of those things the Bush administration should have focused on instead of Iraq. 

Today at lunch I decided to go buy a new car. It needed to be red and have seat warmers. And Blue Tooth for cell phones. And a moon roof. And whatever other new toys they have come up with in the last 10 years. 

I have been thinking about this since I got my new job. That drive over the lake every day will be brutal. I will need comfort and toys. 

I really wrestled with three things:

• I cannot afford this.
• I should probably get a hybrid.
• I should probably get an American car.

My 10 year old Honda CRV only has 78,000 miles on it but every time I take it in for an oil change they find something catastrophic that costs as much as airfare to Maui. First class airfare. I could tell in the last couple of weeks that my transmission was getting ready to go. I really do not need a car payment right now with my house facing thousands of dollars of water damage repairs, but what is a boy to do?

I assumed that I would get a hybrid. Isn’t that what you are supposed to do? Well, I have found that since W is no longer president I don’t care as much about the environment as I used to. It was easy to be pro-environment when it meant being for anything that W was against. But now it’s more about the size of my ass. I tried to squeeze my ponderous bulk into a Toyota Prius, but it took 20 minutes of squishing and sucking before I could sit down and then I could not see out the short little window. Then I tried the Highlander, a big ass Hybrid SUV from Scotland, but there is no way that would fit in my urban Seattle garage. 

The American vs. Japanese thing was less straightforward. For the first time ever I would have seriously considered an American car, a Ford probably. Don’t get me wrong, I think flag burning in the highest form of human expression and celebrating one’s freedom. I spark up some old glories every Fourth of July. I am not going to just salute. American cars are mostly crap, but given the economy right now I would have been happy to go take a test drive in a half assed solidarity thing. I just could not get any dealers to respond back from their web sites. The Toyota dealer was very internet savvy and got back to me immediately. 

So I bopped over there at lunch time today. The Prius was too little, the Highlander was too big. The gas-guzzling non-hybrid Rav 4 was just right. Barcelona Red, seat warmers, Blue Tooth, keyless entry, moon roof, and intermittent windshield wipers! It was made in Ontario, which while being very annoying is North American. 

You may ask why I really need a 4 wheel drive SUV. It’s not like I am driving around in the mountains or hauling kids and dogs to soccer games. Well, sometimes a boy just has to go to Pottery Barn and pick up a new armoire. Actually, this boy has to go to Sodo and buy knock-off antique Chinese furniture on a regular basis. SUV is needed. 

So that is it. I have a new car. 




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